


Randomness

by An Outcast's Shadow



Category: Zoids
Genre: Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2008-01-01
Updated: 2009-01-25
Packaged: 2014-01-03 07:40:44
Rating: T
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,739
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3983056/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/1257675/An-Outcast-s-Shadow
Summary: XD Welcome, this is random behind the scenes of planet Zi. Ever wonder why Raven's so moody? and when or where Prozen became insane? Or why Reese is so..so...Reesey? come inside, and don't be shy, we're all insane in here! insanity not included





	1. Another one bites the dust

A girl with Hair spay  
A man with bugs spray, and a ring to purpose  
A murderer with vengeance  
A man with a migraine  
Van with a papaya  
Fiona's with Zeke  
Irvine is now kicking Dr.D  
this is the song I sing and,  
This is how my story goes  
And the end I do not know

this story is….Something I needed to write….  
Chapter one : Hiltz and the Transvestite

Running the hairbrush through his long, soft white hair, his eyes, covered in a light pastel blue eye shadow, bringing out his red eyes, his new heeled boots, came mid way up his calf and his dress following his nice even curves.  
Prozen hummed to himself, (The tune, that Fiona sings, in the movie Shrek but he does not know she sang it first! And being the Evil genius he is he believes it is the MASTER OF ALL EVIL!) he quietly was wondering how the day will progress.  
Raven was out on a mission, meaning, there was no need to panic, and worry about much today.  
So he was trying on his new… outfit that he just bought, just when the doors to his bed room, burst open.  
Shrieking like A girl Prozen jumped up to his feet, only to find, a red frizzy Haired, half asleep, make-uped like a clown Hiltz…  
"UGG!"(Like a grunt.) Hiltz said, rubbing his eyes. Prozen glared, and walked to the sink.  
"Hiltz, how many times have I warned you not to barge in here!?" Prozen asked looking back at the man he called Hiltz, Who stared blankly back at him.  
"Well? Hiltz?" Prozen asked, waiting for a answer.  
"Um…too many times to count, Sir." Hiltz said falling onto Prozen's twin, king sized bed that had fluffily pink pillows, and a blue Blanket, the bed is massive and would hold Hiltz, Ambient, Reese, Specula, Raven AND shadow! All at the same time.  
"Get off my BED I just had it made." Prozen said, UN-zipping his dress, to revel him in a bright pink thong…  
Lucky for Hiltz, HE WASN'T LOOKING! XD  
"how do you think Reese will React If I asked her to marry me?" Hiltz said playing with his hair, in a girly fashion.  
"Didn't you ask her yesterday?"  
"Yeah, but yesterday, was a fluke, I'm positive she will say yes today, AND not trip me down three flights of stairs, After she sent her bugs onto me!" Hiltz said, positively happy and giddy.  
"How do you purpose she wont do that again?"  
"I.have.Bug.spray..." Hiltz said happily, and clicking at the end of the sentence.  
"And the stairs?" Prozen asked, cocking an eye brow.  
"I have padded my body with Cushions!" Hiltz said chirpy.  
Prozen hit his head, on the nearest object, witch just so happened to be a button that would self destruct a base… 

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

still on  
Chapter one: Raven and Random fruit… 

"LOOK!!!!!!!!" Van squealed, pointing at a shop, that, Fiona could barley see, the roof top of.  
"PAPAYAS!!!!!!!" Van ran off into the crowd for the shop, dirt was kicking up into the air, blocking everyone from being able to see or breathe.  
Fiona looked at Zeke, who growled and they followed Van, but in taking one step the were almost hit by Van who came back to them, with fourteen big papayas.  
"Um…Van…Weren't we meant to get…Food that would last us a long time?"  
"These will last a long time!" Van said downing four in two minutes.  
"VAN!!!!!!!!!!!" Fiona shrieked, causing a titanic plate to move, and cause an earthquake, to hit the city.  
Being knocked off their feet's, the papayas, rolled on the ground and into a hole, that had been created, causing Van to cry.  
"MY LOVES COME BACK TO ME!!!!!!" Van cried, now in tears.

Raven was sitting at a lake, or a river, that lead to a lake, and he saw something bobbing in the water, reaching in and pulling out the fruit, Raven cocked an eye brow...  
"A papaya?" Raven asked and looked up the stream where he saw, four more floating past him, he was utterly confused and got up still looked, he watched, as six more papaya's and different fruit pass by, getting quite confused Raven looked around, He didn't even see shadow.  
"Shadow, come on." He said walking up the river, trying to find the source of these…Random fruits. Raven stopped and stared, in an awkward trance.  
There stood Shadow, watching a geyser and fruit kept flying out of the hole, flying into the air, and into the river…  
Raven watched as it stopped and carefully walked over to shadow, soon, Shadow, was nudging him away. Raven, not liking this hit shadow on the head. And turned back t the geyser.  
Raven was hit in the forehead by an apple as it shot out of the geyser at him.  
Raven stood there twitching. And shadow, had sweat drops all over him.

After Raven's experience watching Fruit and getting hit a few more times, Raven swore he would never eat fruit.  
Getting slightly hungry, he went to his food storage, to find…  
Shadow had filled it to the brim, with.  
You guessed it  
Papayas, and apples, oranges, and mangos, pears, peaches. Raven begin twitching, and he glared at Shadow.  
"Shadow…why are there fruits? IN MY FOOD STORAGE!?  
The organoid, seemed to be amused, and smiled at Raven, who grabbed a wielder, and chased shadow around the fire.  
Slipping on a banana peel, that shadow, had laid down, for some unknown reason.  
Raven landed on hot coals, yelping in pain, and lunging up, Raven found his ass, badly burned.  
Now not being able to sit, and no longer having clothing covering his ass(nice images there huh fan girls?)  
Raven glared at shadow, Who had now got the tools, and was looking smug. 


	2. You'll wake just fine

RandomnessChapter…2Good luck, bad luck, or just simple mistakes.

Raven had to admit, limping towards his Zoid. For having so much...skill, he had the worst luck in history.I mean, he hates zoids, and he got, a Zoid as a present, not just any Zoid, BUT ONE THAT CAN THINK ON IT'S OWN, AND I HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION TO!  
Shadow, Even though Shadow, can be an ok companion, He's still waiting…wanting…  
Raven shuddered, at his own images, and resumed packing up equipment.  
After packing up eveything, Raven felt a strong desire to get coffee, or tea, so re-un packing he begin to make some, sighing, he saw Shadow, the black hunk of junk metal, walking towards him.  
"What do you want now?" Raven growled at the organoid (Can't spell it…)The black metallic creature cocked it head and let out…a jumble of words, Shadow's arms flailed about as he tried to explain something.  
"What?" Raven asked utterly confused at the flailing armed, spastic metallic creature.Shadow stopped, and had to re-think his approach…By the end of a five minute, period of time, Raven was sipping on extremely hot tea…What shadow didn't get just yet, was humans feel pain…So, his new approach was, really painful and lead to Raven screaming in pain, and anger.Shadow's new approach, was bigger movements and louder roars….  
"SHADOW STOP!" The organoid froze, like someone had put it into a cooler or afreezer.  
"What do you want?" Raven said wincing; tea was poured into the southerly region.I was trying to say- Shadow was all quiet and slow.  
"Hurry up." prozen was on the line…having a new mission for you…Raven twitched, his life was getting worse by the second, he already had to get Prozen's prescription, his medical needs, and…lotion…Raven hated being the youngest….he got the shitty jobs…If not to sounding too bad, Raven now was in s much pain, at sitting, and moving his body parts, he had put on a new uniform, and winced slightly, every time he moved, with the zoid or had to change direction, his mission, was the mission to get Fiona. (I won't follow all of the series but I had to do this part.)To make things worse, Van arrived; Raven tried ignoring the pain but failed miserably. After ten minutes, or random button pushing, Van found the tele-com-link-thingy  
"HAHAHHA got you now Raven!"  
"What? You haven't even defeated me…"  
"But…I have found you…"  
"But you don't have me captured yet.." Raven sighed getting bored.  
"Wait let me do that again…HAHAHHAHA I FOUND YOUR HIDEING SPOT RAVEN!"  
"Van…we're out in the middle of the desert, where everyone can see you…THIS IS NOT MY HIDEING SPOT!" Raven yelled, growing angry, frustrated, and tired of Van's stupidity.  
"Fine...let me do-"  
"Why can't you just be a wimp, and squeak Raven…you've done it before…" Raven sighed.Vans begin to ponder this.  
"OMFG IT RAVEN!!!!" Van squealed, he sounded like a girl. Raven got a random sweat drop, before twitching.  
"You said omfg…not oh my Fucking god!"  
"So?"  
"If you're going to say my name in a sentence can you please use all the words! I have my pride and dignity on the line each time you speak."  
"Stfu, about your pride and dignity, Omg, Raven, is that a? Are you burned, you noob need to learn how to pour hot things, Hey..Raven…where you going? Fiona…where's he- FIONA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"Van just realized, Raven took Fiona, while Van was going on his rant….

Chapter 2 still  
YAY  
Proposal!Might get rid of the second part soon…Any way

Reese, was sitting at the kitchen table, her eyes closed, and she was listening to the feet, pounding on the floor.  
She was holding a single rose, and a piece of paper, that declared love to her.Reese, knew, even when it said secret admirer, she knew the person how wrote this.  
"Reese!" A voice boomed, the woman didn't move, in fact it looked like she wasn't paying attention.  
"Will you marry –"  
"Isn't it a lovely day?" Reese begin to talk.  
"Me, I love you so much and I-"  
"I mean the clouds, the sky it-"  
"I think that you and me would make a lovely co-"  
" will be such a nice-"  
"-pel! Did you get the rose, and flower-"  
"Day and I think I will go and -"  
"that I sent to you-"  
"I'm having a fantastic time not listening to a word your saying!"  
"Isn't it pretty just like you and- WHAT!?!?!?!" Hiltz yelled, when Reese got up and left the room…."Damn…." Hiltz sighed befor ethe man went to sulk.

."Reese, you're so evil, why won't you just say yes?"  
"Because, he'd believe me…"  
"So?" Prozen was redoing his nail polish.  
"I don't like Hiltz." Reese said. "I'd rather marry Raven, the hunk of man, he's such a good pilot, and strong, wonderful."  
"Pale,, black hair both those things make him look like death, crazy, maniac, killer, respects no-one…Yes, someone everyone should love!" Prozen said sarcastically.  
"Those are the things I love most about him!" Reese giggled, and Prozen twitched.  
"Why do I bother?"  
"So how do I get rid of Hilts?"  
"Hair spray, it makes his 'frizzy', 'wonderful' hair go straight."  
"More like 'Clown' and 'horrible' hair." Reese said snickering.Prozen sighed, the head ach was coming back, from yesterday."So?" Reese said laying on prozen's desk…  
"What is it and people laying on my things!" Prozen pushed the girl off….Shadow flew in, and opened the compartment, Raven stood there, burned, and holding a paper bag..Coughing he handed the bag to prozen and sat on a chair opposite him.  
"There, are you're…things!"  
"And Fiona?"  
"What about it?"  
"Where is she?"  
"Where is who?"  
"Fiona?"  
"um…what about-"  
"I GAVE YOU A MISSION TO GET FIONA!"  
"Whose Fiona!?"Prozen stared at the boy, who was utterly confused."You're a bad liar…You need to practice on that."  
"Damn it...Can I take a rest? Before I receive punishment for lying and not retrieving Fiona?""  
Yes, go… you are dismissed Raven."

Raven turned and came face to face with Reese.  
"Hi Raven." She said, Raven tried edging around the girl, but found it hard to do so…and he was in allot of unneeded pain.  
"Reese…I need to go..." Raven said, dodging one of Reese's Bear, crushing hug.  
"But I missed you….SOOO MUCH!!!"Raven ran back to the shelter of his room, sighing he fell onto his bed, and fell into a pleasant sleep.Shadow watched his master and curled up…

Reese looked at Hilts, and smiled, her smile was one that reached both her ears, Hilts smiled back and they turned their gazes to the older man.Reese flipped herself onto the desk, and begins singing, humpty dumpty.  
"HUMPTY DUMPTY SAT ON A WALLL! HUMPTY DUMPTY HAD A GREAT FALLL!!!!!!!!" Reese yelled and sang at the same time, Hilts was bouncing up and down, eating popcorn, and throwing it around the room, the popcorn had randomly, came to being in his hands.  
Prozen stared at the scene in front of him, feeling sick.  
Hiltz then begin yelling and singing at the same time, his voice high pitched, and his and Reese's tones intertwined.Prozen groaned in pain.And Hiltz and Reese changed song to 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.' Which when haveing to badly tuned Zoidians singing...you have one hell of a day planned ahead of you.  
Prozen took four aspirins, trying to get rid of the headache.


	3. again?

Chapter three of randomness… shorter and may not be as funny...but I'm trying...  
Changes to the story:  
I am going to change the way my story works, tell me if you hate it…or like it…

After the whole, Hiltz and Reese episode, Prozen fell to his knees, and hit his head, on the ground.  
Raven watched Prozen, do this a few times, before he sat down, and watched the scene, fiddling with a small paintbrush on prozen's desk, Raven realized…  
The paintbrush was wet, looking down, he saw fresh paint.  
Scooting, away from the mess, RPozen looked up.  
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH Raven…"  
"Fido.."  
"Fido…You're here-"  
"MY NAME IS GIDDY!" Raven cried out in pain, and anger, tears in his eyes.  
"I'm sorry giddy-"  
"Quit it Prozen… See I got your name right, my name is Hammy!"  
"Hammy-"  
"Fred..."  
"Gorge?" Prozen asked his eye brow raising at the boy.  
"NO! It's King Kong!" Raven said, trying to hide the fit of laughter…  
TT "Why is everyone out to mess with me!?"  
Raven coughed and looked concerned.  
"You called sir?" Raven said, being calm, and collected..  
"Raven?" Prozen said startled  
"Yes, that's my name…"  
"But….What just happened?"  
"You went on about Fido, and King Kong…"  
"Raven…"  
"Yes sir…"  
"is this a cruel joke?"  
"No sir…I have no clue what you're talking about." With that Raven got up and left, he walked a few steps away from the door before he collapsed and laughed so hard when he heard the older male cry in the room from the head ache.  
Soon Raven walked into the room, to find Shadow, when he saw this scene:  
Hilts stared at Ambient (Yes get to write them so much fun) Who was moon walking and saying in a hyper like voice.  
"I IS BAD HILTZ!!VERY BAD AMBEINT IS THE BAD BOMB!!DUN NANANANANANA!!" Ambient sang moon walking.  
Hiltz had a sweat drop, and handed him cookie…  
"COOKIE FOR ZI BAD ZOID!!" Ambeint yelled, and did happy dance.  
"Is…it just me?" Raven asked sitting next to Reese and Shadow. "Or are they on drugs?"  
Reese to busy being giddy and hyper that Raven was talking to her, she didn't notice what he said instead she cried out…  


"I'M WEARING A THONG!!"  
Raven turned to look at her, with sweat drops, and stared helplessly at Reese.  
"W…Wh…what?"  
"I LOVE YOU LIKE I LOVE MY BONG!"  
"…Reese…can we be-"  
"YES!!I WILL MARRY YOU!!"  
"Just…friends…" Raven pushed the girl who was about to cling to him.  
"HILTS!!" Raven cried, and reached for the man.  
Who looked at the two, all he saw was Reese crying form happiness, and Raven pushing her away.

Yes, hilts believed Raven was harming 'his' Reese.  
And attacked Raven.

Prozen, peeked out of his door, and looked up and down the hallways.  
no sign of them anywhere.  
Sighing, prozen opened the door, and walked out…  
Prozen, heard thumping.  
"Stupid migraine..." He hissed but ignored the thumping.  
It didn't stop, only became louder.  
So he stopped, and turned.  
The next sight was not a happy sight….  
Prozen squeeled….  
Running towards him, was raven, who was screaming bloody murder, a pissed off Hiltz, a horde of bugs, and Reese going to attack hiltz…  
Prozen was in their line of sight.  
"PROZEN!! SAVE ME!!"  
"KILL RAVEN!!"  
"I LOVE RAVEN!"  
"LEAVE ME ALONE!!"

* * *

Van loved fiona.  
Fiona loved Van.  
Zeke loves Thomas...and Thomas...  
well thomas loves Fiona...

Thomas, sat alone, trying to think of ways to kill Van and take Fiona as his bride.  
the best he came up with was.  
1) Feed van to fish...  
2) Feed van to killer fish...  
3) Eat van...  
4) Drop Zeke on Van...  
5)... kiss Fiona...  
6) Go shopping  
7) feed himself soup...  
8) get back on topic of killing van...  
And so on...

Fiona looked at Van, who was fishing, he wasn't good at fishing, but he still tried.  
Zeke was scared of the Fish, and kept squeeling high pitched nosies each time a fish was seen...  
Fiona looked back at Zeke.  
"Zeke...go find thomas! I think he's in love with you!"  
'RAOR!! YAY'  
Zeke took off.  
"I wish zeke loved me..." Van cried.  
Fiona glared.  
"What about me?"  
"I wish Zeke loved you..."  
Fioan got up and walked off.  
"FIONA COME BACK...I need you to get Raven to come back and fight me!!"


	4. HAHA soooo not funny!

This one might not be as funny, but I am really trying to make them funny TT

RAVEN may be gay but in this one, HE IS NOT!  
ok, in my previous one that I have not posted HE IS GAY!  
Btw I made him and Karl have sort of a friend thing going on, because he shows Karl respect once XD

* * *

Randomness: Friends?

I do have to admit, my life's' not all bad, yeah, I got the shity jobs, the crap zoid, the stupid partner, can't remember my past, disrespect the guy I say I respect, hate metallic creatures that rule this planet, have girl that loves me, has a red haired clown that hates me, my rival that is a worse pilot that beat me not once but twice, I have hardly any friends, AND I hate being alone, with the worst luck on Zi!  
Raven sighed and glared at his hands.  
"God I hate Van." He hissed, when a not so comforting voice laughed.  
"Hate often turns into love!" the voice teased, and I glared at the voice.  
"Shubaltz, Karl Shbaultz." I glared and stood up. "Never say that again. " I growled viscously.  
"Runt." Karl walked over and threw something towards me, I caught it in one hand and smirked. Looking proud of myself I missed the next one which hit my head. I fell over in shock and slight pain, then sat up and glared at Karl.  
"I hate you."  
"You hate a lot of people…"  
"So?"  
"Not normal for a teenager to hate that many people."

"I'm, not a normal teenager…"  
"True, but still." Karl sighed.  
"What did you come to talk to me about?" Raven asked growling lightly and opening the chocolate bar. And sitting next to the older male.  
"Reese."  
"What about her?"  
"She's put Video cameras in your room."  
"Again?"  
"Yep."  
"So?"  
"…you're not mad?"  
"Why should I be…she did this last week, and the week before…" Raven sighed glaring at the walls leaving the older male in slight awkwardness.  
"I heard you got your ass whipped." Karl said after a minute break  
"Not literally…" raven shuddered  
"I didn't mean that, I mean that you lost a zoid battle." Karl glared.  
"Shut up! You couldn't do better." Raven looked down.  
"Calm down, at least they didn't find the whips."  
"Blah! Of course not! I think they found out what happened."  
"Ah yes, the fruit, the burns, and shadow. What more evidence that you could have?"  
"I told you to shut up!"  
"When have you and me listened to each other?"  
"Good question…" Raven growled deeply.  
"I heard prozen wants you…"  
"Damn about?"  
"Another mission."  
"Shitty job…."  
"Like always?"

* * *

Van and swings……

Have you ever noticed…SWINGING DOORS!!  
They don't slam shut, nooo!! They hit you right back with the same force you slammed them…..  
Ivan rubbed my sore face and glared at the door, leading to Fiona's room.  
She had slammed the door, it hit Van face on, so he went to repay the favor.  
She wasn't there, so the door swung back, and hit Van square in the face.  
Van's nose had to be broken.  
Van sat on my bed, and stared at the roof he was feeling hungry so getting up, and walking down the halls to the food area.  
It seemed almost empty.  
van felt suddenly alone and scared, so he made loud footsteps.  
Then he heard a noise….  
So he begin humming and stomping his way down.  
Whoosh.  
Van jumped and let out a small cry of being frightened.  
No one was behind the scared male.  
"Raven?" Van asked.  
no response.  
Van begin walking and singing…stomping still.  
A clank before him, and van jumped. "Fiona?" Van squeaked.  
when no response, Van moved closer to the kitchen, hitting the walls, and singing louder, stomping his feet van made sure someone would hear him.  
"Va." A whisper said from down the halls, in front, it was empty, and dark.  
"VAN!." It whispered again. Van screamed and Ran for his life….  
Fiona and zeke came out from the halls. "Zeke?" Fiona rasped. "I thought I heared van." She coughed Fiona had been sick for the past day with a sore throat.

* * *

Fruit and veggies!

Raven went back to Shadow, then to prozwen, the older male said this was urgent…  
"Sir…you called?"  
"Yes Raven!" Prozen said happily.  
"yeah? That's my name…" raven then had a sick look on his face, noticeing what the older male in front of him was doing on his desk…  
it was disturbing…  
"Raven?"  
"Sir…are you?"  
"Am I what?" Prozen growled defensively.  
"Um…sir?"  
"WHAT?!  
"Your…" Raven couldn't say it without, either laughing or…crying and puking. Prozen, was in a short, low cut, hot pink dress, his hair tied up in a ponytail, and straight, his red eyes, had a deep purple eye shadow highlighting them, he also had pink lipstick on. And Prozen was, not only having his legs on the desk, but he was shaving them, with a pink Razor….  
Raven twitched and stared at the sight in front.  
"Yes Raven?" Prozen growled wanting Raven to finish his sentence.  
"Shaving?" Raven said shuddering.  
"SO? not like you have-"  
"I'm not GAY!" Raven snapped Prozen smirked.  
"Oh really.."  
"Yeah sir…What is it with you and Hiltz calling me gay?"  
"Um, let's think of this…"  
"Go ahead!"  
"You wear tight clothes when I gave you the chance of wearing lose clothes."  
"Strike one, and their comfy!"  
"When tackling shadow, you seemed to pin HIM in an odd position, BY straddling HIM Around the WAIST, and it looked like you were-!"  
"How else could I have pinned him?!" Raven yelled angrily stopping him from finishing that sentence.  
"Your only rival is a guy! Surrounded by chicks and he is obviously GAY!"  
"There are hardly any Female pilots that are worth fighting!"  
"You're not attracted to Females!"  
"Reese is hardly a female!" (sorry to Reese fans…)  
"AND….your eye brows seemed to be well plucked, a little long, but well kept, you spend countless hours doing your hair, AND just this morning you asked Hiltz and myself, weither your clothes made you look 'fat'?"  
"I felt fatter than normal okay!? I am not gay! I just like to look better the normal idiots." Ravensaid using his hands for expressions, and prozen stared.  
"Your gay!"

"SIR! What is this MISSION you called me upon!"  
"Oh right….YOU NEED TO GO SHOPPING AGAIN!"  
"Why?"  
Prozen just smirked. And raven winced.


	5. Goodbye, so long nice tr'Good aim!

**Randomness 3:…Did I forget to mention…THAT'S THE WRONG WAY!?**

Reese was laughing and drooling at the same time. She was looking at old photos of Raven when he first came to the base.  
Prozen had a long time trying to get the boy to speak.  
In fact, the boy was so, quiet; he usually went angry and attacked before you knew what you said.  
So during a speech, you just get almost to the end, and then, you have a fist in your face.  
So you weren't sure if the lines.  
"your such an idiot…." Or "You worthless piece of garbage." Was the words that set him off, maybe it was the.  
"Oh fucking shit, god damn us to hell, stupid motherfucking shit piece of crap!"  
Reese didn't know, but the line.  
'Zoids are my friends.' Seemed to always be in the speeches as well, maybe it was that line…  
Reese looked at the time; raven was learning about drama…  
oh truthfully, the boy can't act for shit.  
Here is a little flash back on why he can't:

* * *

"Raven just read the lines." Prozen said when teaching raven how to act.  
Raven cleared his throat and began muttering the words…every so often glared up at Prozen.  
"What's wrong Raven, and please speak up." Prozen growled, at the 13 year old.  
"Lara: Oh woe is me, my ZOID IS DEAD!" Raven sang the last part a bit too happy….  
"RAZVEN your meant to be sad about it-"  
"SAD!? Why? I hate Zoids!"  
"It's the character play the part as the character."  
"Fine….." Raven glared at the lines and spoke in monotone... "Lara: Oh woe is me, my zoid is dead, Paces around the room, before falling on couch. Andrew: don't worry Lara! We can buy a new one-"  
Prozen twitched. "Cut…Raven! Your Lara not Andrew! And do not just stand there and read what your meant to do!"  
"…why am I the girl?"  
"Because you are! Now read!"  
"…I hate you."  
"Do you want to be punished?"  
"Lara: Oh woe is me!" Raven screamed and seemed to be emphasizing the wrong words!  
Prozen just twitched at the mention of his characters name….

Reese shook her head, it was funnier to be there than anything.  
She then looked at his 14th birthday  
the picture had Raven covered in cake and cowering under the table, he was holding a candle in front of him, and it was on fire.  
As you're wondering, no-one really celebrated raven's party, it was more, annoy the hell out of Prozen and Raven time!

do you want to see what happened?  
I'm going to show you anyway!

* * *

Raven sat staring at the cake, he was twitching, Hiltz and Reese baked it.  
Pink and purple flowers around the edges of the 30 X 30cm cake, with the writing in the middle of the cake saying: 'happy birthday gay boy!'  
Prozen, was on the other side of the table, watching Raven's reactions…  
now, to tell the truth he was scared of what Hiltz and Reese where going to pull for the young male.  
This wasn't as bad as he thought it would be.  
But little did he know it was going to get worse.  
"Come on Raven!" Reese sang  
"I'm not gay…"  
"Blow out the candles, bitch boy!" Hilts slapped him on the back, a little too close to the ass.  
"I'm still not gay!"  
"Just blow out the candle's Raven, and it will be all over." Prozen said, not enjoying this game.  
"But..Sir…I don't want to agree that I'm gay." Raven protested and pouted lightly.  
"Raven, just blow out the candles, no-one will know."  
Raven sighed and blew out the candles.  
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a flash.  
Raven tensed just a little bit more.  
"Good for blackmail, isn't it Reese?" Hiltz asked looking at the camera.  
"You got that Right Hiltz…NOW for presents."  
Raven groaned in both fear and anger.  
He was handed seven presents.  
One in bright pink packaging, the others where in butterfly and candy wrapping.  
Raven already knew what was going to happen, it did every year, since he's been there.  
One of the presents, would jump at him.  
And make weird high pitched noises.  
But which one?  
Raven twitched.  
"Open them!" Reese cried she smiled at Raven; her eyes gleamed in the light.  
Specula growled aggressively, warning Raven what would happen if he didn't….  
Raven opened the big present first getting it out of the way.  
They where cruel, cruel people.  
And Raven, was an idiot.  
Something small and alive jumped onto his arm.  
Spider  
Raven screamed and flung the Spider off his arm.  
Reese and Hiltz where laughing so hard.  
You see, Raven was an arachnophobia….  
"I hate you!"Raven cried, from the other side of the room.  
Reese and Hiltz could no longer breathe.

* * *

That you also had to be there for…..  
Reese sighed wiping the tears from her eyes.  
She looked up and Saw a smirking Hiltz.  
"Shhh, I've got a new prank." He said and the two smirked, evilly.

* * *

_**Part 2: I hate fruits, now veggies and old grandmothers!  
**_

* * *

Now, Raven wasn't one to complain much.  
But having to go shopping? IN A TOWN!?  
Call him crazy but, isn't it stupid to send the mass killer out into a town? With his organoid?  
Raven sighed, a few miles from the town, he dropped out of the cock pit. "Shadow, stay here until I call or come back." Raven commanded, before walking to the town, he was wearing his cloak, to hide his face.

Raven looked at the fruit section, and winced, remembering why he hated them.  
So he by-passed them for the last thing to grab.  
his shopping cart was full, by the time he reached the fruit and vegetable section, and that's when things began to go wrong.  
Shadow, burst through the doors, scaring half the customers. And ran over to his master.  
Roaring loudly, to get Raven's attention,  
"Shadow." Raven growled.  
'Raven! I found you! I-'  
"didn't…I….tell you to WAIT!?" Raven threw his hood back to glare at shadow, some people gasped, and some called the Republican army.  
He had to go to the Republican Shopping centers after the last time he went to the Imperial side.  
"EKKKKKKKKKKK!! It's Raven!"  
"Somebody help us!!"  
"WHAT DO YOU WANT SHADOW!! AHHHHHHHHHHH" Raven screamed before, shadow released his cloak, just in time for Raven to fall right into someone.  
"Ow…Ow…Ow…" Raven kept getting hit over the head.  
"Get off me! Brat!" A frail voice commanded, and Raven got up.  
And looked around him.  
Six old women stood there, glaring at him and shadow.  
"Look, we just!" Raven was interrupted by one of the older woman.  
"They hurt, Master Betty!" the old hag said, in an old voice cracked and horse, her wrinkles droped and sagged, while her eyes seemed to hold fire."Get them girls!"

Raven looked at Shadow and glared.  
He and shadow, where hit with purses, Raven tried dodging, but a Banana peel made him slip, and splat, he fell into the grapes.  
Trying to get out, and to safety from the old hags still hitting him. He grabbed a grape, and threw it,   
Hitting Master Betty again.  
Big mistake, he felt his body thrown into another compartment, head in a water melon, and mangos splattered on his clothes.  
Raven tried to run but he was hit down by a passion fruit, Who ever said they had passion where wrong!  
Raven rubbed his sore head, and he again, was hit with a purse…  
He called for shadow, which in fact, was drinking coffee with Master Betty….  
lets just say the rest has become a blur to Raven.  
For which in fact it has for Shadow.

* * *

"So….why did you come to get me?" Raven asked, limping without the bags of food.  
'Van…was trying to fight the frozen geno-'  
"VAN!? And you didn't TELL me?" Raven cried, in anger.  
'You where busy….'  
"I hate you!"  
'Good, my day is not complete until I hear though words from your lips.' Shadow seemed to perk up.  
"So? Where's Van? There's the idiot it…" Raven groaned watching van for a few seconds before shadow took him to the cock pit.  
Van sat there, trying to communicate to the empty zoid.  
"Come on Raven…Talk to me…. RAVEN!?"  
"Van…my zoid has not moved, nor was I here-"  
"Then how'd ya' know I was here!?"  
"Shadow told me…"  
"Your shadow?"  
"No, my organoid!"  
"He did what?"  
"He told me you where here!"  
"So? That doesn't explain how you…OHHH so you were sleeping?"  
"No Van….I wasn't here!" Raven growled  
"Then how'd ya' know I was here!?" Van asked, still confused  
Raven twitched. "So van…what have you done today?" Raven asked, trying to get Van ranting so he could get the hell away from the boy.  
"Looked for you!"  
"Van, I'm speechless, you where looking for me!"  
"You aren't speechless…your still talking!"  
"Thanks for pointing that out…."  
"No problem! But like I said, I was looking for you…and…. Wait you never told me how You knew I was here!"  
Raven had now, instead of leaving like he had planned, now has been hitting his head on the nearest object, that he could find.


	6. Hopes will be crushed! NOT FUNNY

"Um…Raven?" Van asked yet again, and the mass murderer still didn't Pay attention, Van was getting worried, and finally, looked around looking if the coast was clear to help his enemy.  
"OI! RAVEN PLEASE LISTEN YOU'RE GOING TO EXPLODE!!!"  
"What? Oh crap…." Raven then heard the odd noises and that female voice saying. 'Countdown to self destruct sequence is to begin in ten…nine…'  
"SHIT!" Raven cried, and looked at Van, both of the males, actually didn't hate each other; it was more of a play or acting, I mean, when you find someone you could actually make fun of, and act like idiots around…  
Or I'm just being an arse and laying my head off to you!  
In fact, Raven was more so embarrassed that his Rival had actually had to HELP him get out of this mess.  
As Shadow was no help at all; watching from afar and laughing his head off….  
Raven hadn't called him, So Shadow hasn't come to help him, and it was fair.  
Besides, Shadow and Zeke, both where drinking Tea, and talking to guess who!  
Master BETTY!!!  
No I'm only joking, Ya see in this chapter, it's not really part of Randomness, only just a small break from it.. XD  
like bloopers of all the other chapters, as the first five chapters where all one episode!

_**so let's go through the other chapters**:_

**Chapter one: I'm sure you all remember this part…**

"Hiltz, how many times have I warned you not to barge in here!?" Prozen asked looking back at the man he called Hiltz, Who stared blankly back at him.  
"Well? Hiltz?" Prozen asked, waiting for a answer.  
"Um…too many times to count, Sir." Hiltz said falling onto Prozen's twin, king sized bed that had fluffily pink pillows, and a blue Blanket, the bed is massive and would hold Hiltz, Ambient, Reese, Specula, Raven AND shadow! All at the same time.  
"Get off my BED I just had it made." Prozen said, UN-zipping his dress, to revel him in a …  
Lucky for Hiltz, HE WASN'T LOOKING! XD  
"how do you think Reese will React If I asked her to marry me?" Hiltz said playing with his hair, in a girly fashion.  
Prozen looked at him, still in his bright pink thong and watching Hiltz.  
"The same way you'd react if you were looking at me right now…." Prozen responded, turning away from Hiltz, smirking.  
"What? Looking OH MY GOD PROZEN! PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Hiltz shirked running out of the room.  
"I HAVE TO GO GOUGE MY EYES OUT YOU SICK FREAK!!!..."

**Chapter 2:**

"Why can't you just be a wimp, and squeak Raven…you've done it before…" Raven sighed. Van begin to ponder this.  
"OMFG IT RAVEN!!" Van squealed, he sounded like a girl. Raven got a random sweat drop, before twitching.  
"You said omfg…not oh my Fucking god!"  
"So?"  
"If you're going to say my name in a sentence can you please use all the words! I have my pride and dignity on the line each time you speak."  
"Stfu, about your pride and dignity, Omg, Raven, is that a? Are you burned, you n00b need to learn how to pour hot things, Hey..Raven…what are you doing….how did you get the cock pit open? Fiona…where's he- FIONA!!....EWW WILL YOU STOP SUCKING FACE WITH HIM WHEN I'M HERE FIONA!!! RAVEN!!! EWWWWWWWWWW ZEKEK KICK THEM OUT OF HERE!!!!LIGER!!!! help"

**Chapter three:**

Prozen, peeked out of his door, and looked up and down the hallways.  
No sign of them anywhere.  
Sighing, prozen opened the door, and walked out…  
Prozen, heard thumping.  
"Stupid migraine..." He hissed but ignored the thumping.  
It didn't stop, only became louder and the floor began to shake.  
So he stopped, and turned.  
The next sight was not a happy sight….  
Prozen squeeled….  
Running towards him, was raven, who was screaming bloody murder, a pissed off Hiltz, a horde of bugs, and Reese going to attack hiltz…  
Prozen was in their line of sight.  
But who would have guessed, all Where being chased by a large group of lions, elephants, giraffes, crocodiles, penguins, and kangaroos….  
Prozen twitched. "CUT! HOW ON ZI DID THEY GET HERE!"  
Prozen's questions wasn't answered and Raven latched himself to prozen's body screaming. "RUN FOREST RUN!"  
"My names not….RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Prozen ran off or limped off.

**Chapter four:**

"I'm not GAY!" Raven snapped, holding his hand up and close to his body. Prozen smirked.  
"Oh really.."  
"Yeah sir…What is it with you and Hiltz calling me gay?"  
"Um, let's think of this…"  
"Go ahead!" Raven said, stomping his foot.  
"You wear tight clothes when I gave you the chance of wearing lose clothes." Prozen used his hands to count down.  
"Strike one, and their comfy!" Raven crossed his arms and stomped hso foot again.  
"When tackling shadow, you seemed to pin HIM in an odd position, BY straddling HIM Around the WAIST, and it looked like you were-!"  
"How else could I have pinned him?!" Raven yelled angrily stopping him from finishing that sentence.  
"Your only rival is a guy! Surrounded by chicks and he is obviously GAY!"  
"There are hardly any Female pilots that are worth fighting!"  
"You're not attracted to Females!"  
"Reese is hardly a female!" (sorry to Reese fans…)  
"AND….your eye brows seemed to be well plucked, a little long, but well kept, you spend countless hours doing your hair, AND just this morning you asked Hiltz and myself, weither your clothes made you look 'fat'?"  
"I felt fatter than normal okay!? I am not gay! I just like to look better the normal idiots." Raven said using his hands for expressions, and prozen stared.  
"Your gay!"  
"I am Not!" Raven cried.  
"You watched Van walk around shirtless the other day!"  
"That was because he had hair that needed to be waxed off." Raven said clicking his tongue and waving his hand.  
"Was that fun?"  
"More sexual then ever…"  
"Told you…your gay!"  
(that was only for funXD)

_The next chapter I put up will be a proper chapter, as this one was me just letting my anger vent out.  
Sorry bout getting your hopes up, the bloopers wheren't that funny I know, but it was fun to re read the early chapters XD!  
Have a great day everyone!_


	7. Truth, dares and insanity

*cough* drum roll please!  
*taptaptaptaptaptap*  
WELCOME FOOLISH MORTALS!  
*small elf appears.* Sir... you're in room five, where you're saying that in *looks at clipboard* The new amine about demons....  
*large figure leaves room, leaving a small wolf half-ling*  
Hi everyone Wolfy here! did you all miss me?  
*one person claps*  
That was more then last time! Let the show begin!

* * *

**Randomness 7:  
Truth, dare and insanity**

All is peaceful on the planet Zi, Van is eating food, Fiona is counting numbers, Moonbay is hitting Irvine, and Zeke, is, scaring Thomas.

But, Suddenly, the world turned upside down, WHEN - Raven slammed the door open, and screamed into Prozen's face. "OMG!KACHINGPROZENINEEDEDTOTELLYOUTONOTTOUCHMYNONEXISTENTBREASTS!BECAUSEIAMABOYANDIHAVENOBREASTSANDIFANYONECANUNDERSTANDMESAYBRAWKORNOTNOWISHALLPUTINRANDOMSYMBOLSSA'VY?BUTNOIBEATNO-ONEINTHISWHOLEWIDEWORLDUNDERSTANDS ME CAUSE I AM RAVEN!!!!!!!"  
Screaming this incoherent sentence in Prozen's face had caused Prozen's perfectly brushed white hair to fly back, as the red eyes man stared wide eyed at the black haired now panting and slouched boy.

"Raven… " Prozen tried to re-form his hair that was now sticking backwards from the force of Raven's scream. "SLOW THE HELL DOWN!"

Raven panted before straightening himself up.

"I thought you'd say that!" Raven snapped stamping his foot and storming out of the office, leaving a very, very confused Prozen, who just only realized… he was in a silky nightgown, barley covering his whitey flesh, and that the nightgown was also, transparent.

Crying out in fear, Prozen protected his genitals from peering eyes and slammed his door shut.  
He wondered suddenly how he walked down that halls without being noticed…. Or not noticing his lack of clothing. Shrugging it off he turned back to sit into his leathery chair.  
Prozen also was wondering why he was standing up when Raven came into his office.

About five minutes later, Raven slammed open the door, with two different sized lumps in his shirt almost looking like off sized breasts…. If anyone understands why, say I.

"ThewheelsonthebusgoroundandroundroundandroundroundandroundThewheelsonthebusgoroundandroundalldaylong!"Raven was dancing in a small circle, his hands seems connected to his forehead just above his eyes, and he jumped dancing with random movements. Taking a swift bow Raven slammed Prozen's door and giggled running down the hall.

"That is the last time I give him red bull…." Prozen said rubbing his temples trying to rid the everlasting migraine, but right before he could, the door slammed open, reveling:  
No, not again.  
Anything but that!

R….r….R….

You're waiting so patiently....  
I wouldn't be able to wait this long...

OMG you're still reading this?  
Well here goes nothing...  
Reese, in a bikini!  
Prozen shrieked, an ear piercing shriek, which echoed all around the planet Zi, waking up those poor sleeping fools! At twelve Pm. *shifty eyes*  
"Hi Prozen." Reese said sweetly, and seductively licking her lips. Prozen tried clawing his way out of the room, once he saw that Reese wasn't joking.

Shutting the door with a soft click, Reese locked the office.

"Come here, you dirty man." Reese practically purred, as she moved over to Prozen, a soft seductive smirk played on her pink lips.

It was only then that Prozen realized He was wearing his bright pink thong, which showed through his transparent nightgown…  
Whoever thought I forgot about it, you'll find YOU'RE WRONG! =P

Reese grimaced lightly when Prozen wasn't watching. Raven would pay…. He would pay dearly for this.  
Smirking evilly Reese thought of many ways to get the black haired boy back.

* * *

Shutting the door, Reese walked over to the two males, each one smirking and giggled up at her. "Who's next?" Hiltz asked, And Reese bit her lip, thinking about her next choice, she threw down the photo she was sent in to get, and Raven snatched it up, giggling like a school girl he looked up at Reese, who was scowling.

"Raven, you are so gay…. And I chose Hiltz." She said calmly, and heard a sigh of relaxation come from Raven, who was sitting next to her.

"Ummm." Hiltz thought, ignoring the two teens watching the other carefully, for different reasons. "Truth…." Hiltz said making up his mind.

"Do you?" Reese thought about her question. Truth hadn't come up often in the game and when it did, it was boring. "Moisturize you're hands?" Reese finished and watched as both raven and Hiltz shuddered.

"Unfortunately, yes." Hiltz said shuddering at the memories. "Raven would also know the pain caused because of it." Hiltz said, looking up and meeting violet eyes. Reese looked between the two.

"What do you mean?" She asked watching them, they both responded at the same time, staring wide eyed at her.

"Prozen." A small gulp came from both boys before they said identically." Forces us to, after and before, we eat, train, wash our hands, pet our organoids, touch anyone else, light a candle, touch his hair, brush our teeth, listen to music, brush our own hair, take our nail polish off, pick our teeth, replace my phones batteries, open the fridge, put deodorant on play with magnets….and anything else we do in a day."

Reese could only twitch, the two boys winced as they remembered what else Prozen made them do.  


* * *

I wanted to leave the rest of this for the next chapter XD  
I liked this one, and please review.


End file.
